A Crooked Kind of Perfect

Mabelline Person appears with Zoe’s registration package and the hotel room key, which she hands to Zoe’s dad before encouraging him to go spend some time in the quiet. Mabelline writes the room number and time of Zoe’s performance on Zoe’s dad’s hand and assures him that Zoe will be fine. Zoe wants to agree, but separating from her dad is more difficult than she expected.

Mabelline takes Zoe to meet Mona, another 11-year-old girl who is also a student of Mabelline’s. She drops Zoe in a hotel room with Mona and her mother, who have been to several competitions and already know how everything works. Zoe can’t believe that Mabelline is leaving her with people she just met, and when she hears that Mabelline won’t be at the performance either, she starts to panic. When Zoe asks Mabelline what to do if she makes a mistake, Mabelline tells her to “just keep playing” (145).

Mona’s mom takes the time to explain how the competition works to Zoe, telling her that she will play once tonight and again tomorrow. Each performance will have two judges, and they will note down everything from song choice to any mistakes made. Zoe will be competing against nine other people her age, and the top five get a trophy. Neither Zoe nor Mona wants to eat before the competition, and Zoe asks if anyone has ever thrown up while performing. Mona answers that nobody has thrown up, but one person did faint. His mother shook him back awake, and he finished his song to a standing ovation.

Zoe imagines Carnegie Hall, with its prestige and its balconies, where people sit and wait, holding their breath for the next stunning performance. She imagines herself gracefully walking onto the stage and waving to the crowd to make a grand entrance.

In the room where Zoe will perform, there are crowds of people and no grand entrances. Three organs sit at the front, including the one Zoe has, and two larger, more sophisticated versions. The brochure that describes the various organs calls the D-60 “a cozy choice” (153), which Zoe likens to a pair of socks.

The performances begin, and Zoe is one of the last performers on the list, so she sits in the audience and watches other kids play everything from showtunes to hip hop. Zoe listens to the parents in the audience criticizing other performers but never their own children. She watches the doors open and close, waiting for her dad to appear, but he never does.

Zoe walks up to the front to play her song, and neither her parents nor her piano teacher are there. Still holding her registration package, Zoe gets the sense that others are laughing at her as she puts it down on the floor in front of her. When she sits down at the D-60, she turns on the rock beat, and no sound comes out. The judge realizes nobody else has used the D-60 yet and turns it on, and the rock music blares out loudly. Zoe fixes the volume and starts playing, and almost immediately fumbles on the pedals. She tells herself to keep going anyway.

Zoe tells herself to “just keep playing” (165), and she gets through her song with a few mistakes but without giving up. She leaves the stage and almost slips, but she finds her footing and goes to where Mona and her mom are sitting. They congratulate her on not giving up and playing through her mistakes, then Mona takes her turn.

Zoe remembers when she heard Vladimir Horowitz say, “Perfection itself is imperfection” (165), which means that it isn’t enough to simply play the right notes. What makes a great pianist—or musician of any kind—is the ability to put one’s heart into it. Zoe hears Mona play and knows she has found that ability.

Zoe notices that everyone in the audience is smiling as Mona plays her piece. She feels like Mona’s passion is so evident in her playing that it spreads out to everyone else, and it makes her feel like singing.

Mona and her mom take Zoe back to her hotel room, where Zoe finds her dad inside. The hotel room is set up just like home, and Zoe’s dad spent the time organizing and cleaning. He explains to Zoe that he got his hands dirty while doing so and washed the room and time off his hands. He promises to come to the next performance tomorrow, and Zoe forgives him. They sit and eat some sandwiches that Zoe’s dad made at home earlier that day.

The phone rings, and it’s Wheeler on the other end. He tells Zoe to listen and burps into the phone, proudly announcing that he learned to burp upside down. Zoe laughs and tells Wheeler about how she performed. She also tells Wheeler about how inspiring Mona’s playing is and how it fills her up with music. Wheeler replies that Zoe plays that way too, and Zoe is surprised to hear it.

Zoe and her dad are in the performance room the following day, waiting for the competition to begin. Zoe’s dad is proud of her for playing through her mistakes, and Zoe is proud of him for making it to her show. Zoe’s dad looks agitated until Mona starts playing her pieces, and Zoe can tell that the music moves him, too. Zoe is next, and her dad seems even more nervous than before. Zoe goes up to play her song, and when she hears the door slam, she thinks it’s her dad leaving. As she plays, the music fills her, and she feels proud of herself for coming this far.

Zoe goes to the back of the room to find her dad and mom both standing there, waiting for her and grinning.

Zoe’s parents congratulate her, then Zoe’s dad goes back to the hotel room while her mom sits with her through the rest of the performances.

Zoe’s mom has fun using her makeup mirror to spy on the judges’ tallies, and Zoe finds this amusing.

Zoe and her mom listen to the rest of the performances, and Zoe notices how much fun everyone is having. Afterwards, Mona and her mother invite Zoe and her mom out for lunch. While they wait for Zoe’s mom to call her dad, Mona talks about one of the boy organists and how cute she is. She asks Zoe if she has a boyfriend, and Zoe thinks of Wheeler. She likes Wheeler and even thinks he’s cute, but she doesn’t think of him as a boyfriend. She also doesn’t consider Colton a good choice for herself, so she simply answers, “No.”

Zoe and her mom go with Mona and her mom to a burger place in the mall. Zoe listens as her and Mona’s mothers talk about how badly they wanted to feel cool as kids and laugh at themselves for being so preoccupied with such a thing. Mona’s mom starts singing Zoe’s song, which she discovers is about a man who doesn’t care about money as long as he has his love with him. Afterwards, Zoe and her mom hold hands as they walk to the car together.

Zoe’s mom comes up with a formula for who the five winners are likely to be, and Zoe’s name isn’t on that list. Zoe wonders if her mom thinks she played poorly, or if her mother’s formula is flawed.

Zoe waits as the winners of each age group are slowly announced. She becomes more and more nervous as names are called. When the 11-year-old category finally comes up, Zoe’s name is announced in fourth place, and she almost doesn’t register what she hears. She and her mother both jump up, and Zoe goes to accept her fourth-place trophy with pride.

Zoe admires her beautiful trophy, which is elegantly designed and made of marble. Mabelline appears to congratulate Zoe and tell her that she will receive a plaque with her name on it in a few weeks. Zoe looks over at Mona, who holds a first-place trophy, and they smile at one another.

Zoe and her mom call home to tell Zoe’s dad that she won fourth place. Zoe’s dad hollers for joy, and Wheeler, who is in the background, does the same. Zoe’s dad asks her if she finally likes the organ (and trophy) more than the piano, but Zoe still isn’t sure. She loves playing the organ but still feels like it doesn’t compare to a piano. Zoe’s mom then calls into her work, and Zoe notices her mother’s mood perking up again. She thinks her mom is happy to be talking about work, but she then realizes that her mom is describing Zoe’s performance and how proud she is of her daughter.

Zoe watches the world pass by as her mom drives them home and eventually falls asleep. She dreams of playing the piano.

Zoe wakes up to the sound of Wheeler tapping on the car window. He smiles at her, and she gets butterflies. They go inside together. Zoe celebrates her birthday and her achievement with her family and Wheeler, who presents her with her cake again, this time with a little marzipan version of herself that he made on top. Zoe feels like crying but stops herself, and she notices that Wheeler feels the same way. Zoe’s mom apologizes for missing her birthday and encourages her to make a wish now.

Zoe’s mom asks if she wished for a piano, and although that isn’t what Zoe wished for, it’s what she gets. Her mom and dad surprise her and tell her that they’re trading the organ in for a second-hand piano—the one Emma didn’t want. Zoe is thrilled and beyond excited, and she doesn’t mind that it’s not a perfect, brand-new piano. Zoe’s dad then announces that he found a job as an early morning baker, which is perfect for him because he’s skilled at it and won’t have to work with customers. Zoe is shocked but happy to see that her dad is doing things he didn’t think he was capable of. Everyone toasts to all the great news, and Zoe adds a toast for her mom, who made time to come to the competition. All Zoe wished for was to be with her family.

Zoe and Wheeler sit outside waiting for Zoe’s piano to be delivered. Zoe asks Wheeler about his mom, but he admits it’s a long story and doesn’t seem to want to tell it right now. Zoe’s piano arrives and is wheeled into the house, and her organ is taken out in its place. She silently thanks her organ but is grateful to have the instrument she always wanted finally in her grasp. Zoe signs the delivery form, and the piano is officially hers. Although it has some scratches and dings on it, it’s all she wants and needs. Wheeler encourages Zoe to try it out right away, and her parents come to watch as well. Zoe sits down at the piano as her loved ones surround her, holding their breath and waiting for the first note.